Dads are a vital part of our family structure and also within our communities. A good dad or a bad dad can have a lasting effect on the lives of our children and this responsibility can’t be taken likely.

Our fathers, for the most part, get a bad wrap in our communities. This is because so many of them help make the babies but disappear when they are needed the most. They also are known for not providing the financial support to their families which creates a substantial hardship to help to raise them.  Once these families go into a downward spiral because their dads did not come through, poverty can set in.

Although there is a lot of truth to these statements of negativity, there is also a group of fathers that are not deadbeats. These kinds of fathers are the “REAL DADS”. They are not the no-show individuals who you can’t count on. On the contrary, these dads stay in there and do whatever it takes to help to raise their children responsibly which is what we are going to talk about in this article.

Historical data states that a large majority of fathers learn to become a father by watching their fathers. I watched my father and I’m sure plenty of you men have done also. And to be truthful, some things our fathers did we loved and there were other things that we disliked.

I didn’t know how difficult it was to be a “Good Dad” until I became a dad myself. There is so much more involved in being a dad than I thought. When adding up all the responsibilities, I see why it can scare the weak men away. However, once a man walks away he normally will do it all his life, and that is not good.

For the “REAL DADS”, there is not just the financial support, changing diapers, rocking the babies to sleep, attending to the school activities, dropping them at the babysitters, making dinners when the mothers are under the weather, taking the children to the doctors and the number of deeds that you have to perform is endless. I have learned that all of this is required in being a “REAL DAD”.

I don’t consider myself a good dad as I’m still on the job learning how to become one. I still have some weaknesses that need improvement. Plus, I don’t believe that you can call yourselves a good father, the best fathers are what your children say about you. If you do the right thing, or you don’t do what is right, children will tell you the truth.

Also, a father can’t always be your buddy, as that is not his role. It requires them to use wisdom and apply tough love when appropriate, which I feel is missing in many of the families today.

However, as “FATHER’S DAY”, is coming up, I want to salute those terrific and very responsible fathers who chose not disappear like what all the press say about them. But those men who love their children and have stayed in their lives not only until they became adults, but are still doing the right thing to be a role model to them and to their grandchildren.

All I know is that I’m still working on being a good dad, and I salute the other fathers who are doing the same. Our collective efforts of being good dads will improve our standards within families and in our communities.  And more importantly, it will show our boys coming up behind us how to become good dads when they grow up and become dads themselves.  Remember, the blueprint of being a “REAL DAD” they will get from you.